FYI, Rian and I have a maybe project in the works, so my posting is non-existent. Thank goodness for my MaryAnna keeping this alive while Rian and I work out logistics (NO, I am NOT pregnant.)
#firstworldproblems. I sound like a whiner. Be prepared.
It’s really hard to eat cleanly and stay vigilant to Whole 30 during the summer. Waaaah, right? But wait! Summertime is when I come out of teacher hibernation and become social again. Here’s my stumbling block … social to me means eating and drinking. I apparently don’t do much with my friends besides eat and drink. Even when we plan something else, at some point, we land on eating and drinking. Going Whole 30, going Whole MaryAnna during summer vacation has been much harder than I thought. I truly thought that summer would be the perfect time to focus on me. To focus on eating well! Instead, it has been a much larger hurdle than I anticipated. Instead of using my (well deserved * cough, cough *) summer vacation to plan, prep, cook, walk, sleep, I have instead wanted to brunch, lunch, drink, and sleep.
I have finally buckled down, however, and have begun to use this time to put myself first. A reminder that putting myself first isn’t selfish; it’s necessary. In addition to putting myself first and starting to regain control of my impulses, I have discovered that along with my own strength, I continue to have an astounding number of loyal, supportive loved ones and friends. This whiner is a lucky lady.
This week I will be traveling to Maine for two weeks. This year’s vacation is a mixed bag. In the past, Maine has been a refuge, a place to hole up and feed the introvert that lives inside of me. This year, my trip revolves around a celebration of life, a service to honor my Uncle Phil who passed away last fall. My Uncle Phil, of whom I was his favorite eldest goddaughter. See what he did there? I am scared to go to a place where he was such a presence, and for the first time, truly come to the realization that he is gone. I am scared that my coping mechanism of eating will overpower my desire to feel well – that the emotions of the two weeks will overshadow my forward momentum. The two weeks will be filled with family, love, laughter, music and mosquitos. I am afraid my priority of putting myself first will slowly fade into the background and my old habits of putting everyone else first will reemerge. But putting myself first is essential. It is needed. Don’t tell my mother, but she is right. If I don’t put my oxygen mask on first, I won’t be able to help all the people I care about. Putting myself first isn’t selfish; it’s necessary.
Come follow my roasted veggie obsession on instagram: @thewholemaryanna